Bad Luck and Me. . .

So. . . I have bad luck. On Saturday, was playing football with my friends and broke my ankle. I'd like to say that I was going for the touchdown that would win my team the game and heroically broke it in the process! But, alas, that was not to be. I was trying to intercept a ball and I twisted it in a hole in the ground running backwards. We went to the hospital today and they confirmed that it was indeed broken. We are making an appointment on Monday to see when I will get my cast. Right in the middle of the soccer season. . . DANG IT! This happened last year with my wrist. (sigh) Someone up there doesn't want me playing soccer.

Family Easter Photo

It was hectic. . .

But we took the picture!

RaNDom FaCTs

Each year, there are more than 40,000 toilet related injuries in the United States.

Early Romans used to use porcupine quills as toothpicks.

Fine-grained volcanic ash can be found as an ingredient in some toothpastes.

The average office desk has 400 times more bacteria than a toilet.

When Scott Paper Company first started manufacturing toilet paper they did not put their name on the product because of embarrassement.

Jedi is an official religion, with over 70,000 followers, in Australia.

A rat can fall from a five story building without injury.

A sneeze can travel as fast as 100 miles per hour.

All clams start out as males; some decide to become females at some point in their lives.

Ancient Egyptians slept on pillows made of stone.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch procejt at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosnt mttaer waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

City dwellers have longer, thicker, denser nose hairs than country folks do.

Clinophobia is the fear of beds.

Club Direct, a travel insurance company in Britain, provides insurance plans for protection from falling coconuts.

Each nostril of a human being register smell in a different way. Smells that are made from the right nostril are more pleasant than the left.

Fingernails grow fastest on the hand you favor.

Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails.

German chemists made a replica of a trophy the size of one molecule.

Given the opportunity, deer will chew gum and marijuana.

All babies are color blind when they are born.

20% of tuxedo rentals take place in May.

20252 is Smokey the Bears own zip code.

About 1 in 30 people in the U.S. are in jail, on probation, or on parole.

Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

About twenty-five percent of the population sneeze when they are exposed to light.

Q-Tip Cotton Swabs were originally called Baby Gays.

The IRS employees tax manual has instructions for collecting taxes after a nuclear war.

A baboon called Jackie became a private in the South African army in World War I.

Cat urine glows under a black-light.

Children laugh about 400 times a day, while adults laugh on average only 15 times a day.

Farmers in England are required by law to provide their pigs with toys.

From a complete stop, a human is capable of outrunning a Formula One Racecar for about 30 feet.

Gloucestershire airport in England used to blast Tina Turner songs on the runways to scare birds away.

More people are killed each year by vending machines than by Sharks.

In 1982, a high school student from Los Angeles, California unscrambled the Rubik's Cube in 22.95 seconds.

25% of your bones are located in your feet.

It takes a drop of ocean water more than 1,000 years to circulate around the world.

About half of all Americans are on a diet on any given day.

A blue whale's heart is the size of a Volkswagen Beetle!

If the population of China walked past you in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

More Americans have died in car accidents than have died in all the wars ever fought by the United States.

Stilts were invented by French shepherds who needed a way to get around in wet marshes.

A queen bee uses her stinger only to sting another queen bee.

Leonardo da Vinci was dyslexic, and he often wrote backwards.

No matter its size or thickness, no piece of paper can be folded in half more than 8 times.

A toothpick is the object most often choked on by Americans.

You are about 1 centimeter taller in the morning than in the evening!

The 7-Eleven Extreme Gulp is 50% bigger than the volume of the human stomach!

Most car horns honk in the key of 'F'.

A polar bear's skin is black. Its fur is not white, but actually clear.

99% of people cannot lick their elbow. (Bethany can!)

Will's New Hobby continued. . .

So we went to the emergency room and got an X-ray of Will:

Will's New Hobby

Ever seen one of these?

My brother will swallowed one today. Yes I said swallowed! One minute it was in his mouth and the next. . . it wasn't. We weren't to stressed at first, he had swallowed it without any difficulty so we figured he would be okay. Then I thought, hey, I wonder if a magnet would stick to his stomach. I got one of those flimsy magnets and pressed it to his stomach. I thought I felt a little something, but no one would believe me. So Bethany got a stronger one. The result?
Mommy called the doctor and the doctor cried: No more magnets in Will's side. No just kidding. He said we probably should not be sticking magnets to his stomach. oops. The doctor said it will most likely pass through. Yay!

Excuses for Missing Homework

Here are some excuses you can use if you forget to do your homework.

1. Another pupil fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drowned.
2. I didn't do it because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad.
3. My dog ate it. Seriously, look, I brought a stool sample.
4. A mosquito bite triggered an allergic reaction to paper and ink.
5. I loaned it to a friend, but he suddenly moved away.
6. I had to bail mom out of jail again.
7. I did my homework in my head, I didn't know I was supposed to write it down. Next time should I show my work?
8. I was better suited for missionary work yesterday, rather than homework.
9. I had to stop and change a nun's tire.
10. I spent the evening volunteering at the local soup kitchen.
11. I didn't want to add to my teacher's already heavy workload.
12. I put it in a safe, but lost the combination.
13. Some aliens from outer space borrowed it, so they could study how the human brain worked.
14. I was kidnapped by terrorists and they just let me go a few minutes ago, so I didn't have time to do it.
15. The lights in our house went out, and I had to burn it to get enough light to see the fuse box.

Ha ha! Funny. I looked those up!

April Fools!

Here are some funny pranks!




April Fools everybody!